Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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