Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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