Non-Jews are for practice
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Randomize
