Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Randomize
