I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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