fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
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