No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
