I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Randomize
