he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Randomize
