Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
