But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
The best revenge is premature balding
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Randomize
