too bad you live with your parents still
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Randomize
