She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
