Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
