do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Randomize
