Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Randomize
