official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
they call him Oral-B. enough said
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
