Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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