ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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