I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
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