yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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