I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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