Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
