I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
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