I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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