you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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