Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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