He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
