im having a threesome with these popsicles
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
