I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
