I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
