there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
