That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
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