Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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