thus making me awesome and them whores
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
