He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
You ate ashes out of my bong
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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