he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
