??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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