I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
