Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
