Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
