Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
dude i'm inner monologue high
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Randomize
