South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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