on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
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