No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
