Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
