Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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