Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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