FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
