At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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